I had to say sorry for my forgiveness…!!!

My earlier paintings you had hesitated or refused to see because of ignorance born out of your paranoiac  immaturity and had advised my father to remove them without seeing them…and 25 years later you are mentally still incapable and insensitive to stand before my work of art.. My painting… To appreciate and judge them. My creations involve surrealism, metaphysics, symbolism, metaphor, time distortion and fantasies and many honorable artists swore that my canvasses are “read like a book and heard like an epic.” Do you know the meaning or understand these words. As a human being who has my kind of hyper active, sensitive and a working mind like mine? I am all ears for the unusual extra ordinary reviews and comments… but my heart feels pity on those who simply come up to me and say that I am happy to see your paintings.. How hollow, insensitive and out of the context paranoid comment by a person. It was deplorable then and years later it still is. Even GOD cannot change the past and the past is never dead… it is not even past, as I think there is no snow of yesterdays…                                                                                                                        

I am highly observant and very sensitive in my calmness and someone like you from my past tried to converse with me..! I just admire that courage you gathered in these so many years to stand in front of me..!! your lusterless face, droopy shoulders, dried up lips, wet eyes… trying to hold something, trying to conceal something… your whole body language trying to curtail something… and finally everything filtered down to your inability to look at me, I know because they think I can read mind through eyes.. Was it not the same condition of mine when I first heard I am an addict..?? I think you don’t know that when something is rolling in front of you, a point in time on that wheel of span, half its way, goes away from you and you shut your eyes thinking it is gone.. But dear.. Remember and observe its half way it comes towards you… so dear never close your eyes, the life is rolling. To my astonishment and surprise everyone starts their conversation using words like love, love,crush, attachment, my truth, sorry, guilt, I forget, I don’t remember etc, etc… which makes me uncomfortable and just to stop this conversation, I ask them “have you ever loved me??” a question asked by a person who hates love and what they mean by it……..’How ironic BRUTUS’… I don’t understand why they start crying… For me it is the most primitive reflex but they cry and say, “Yes yavishtha I revere you… and trust me I do….” Such blatant statement makes me agitated and embarrassed too but.. They change their answer fearing my calm, smiling and staring eyes..! An unusual response against my mental agitation and they say, “they admire me till they were with me…!” Oh…I just give them the freedom to cry… have you ever made someone to cry without doing anything..? I don’t know why I love those puffy eyes, watery eyes, wet eyelashes… Sometimes wide sometimes narrow, crying eyes shedding tears..! The rolling teardrops which shine like solitaires…why they look beautiful to me.. When their tears start drying up and to continue our conversation I ask in continuity, “when were you there with me”? I don’t know why they don’t answer me this simple question but for my surprise, their conversation stops here.. And when these demons of hell develop this kind of mental block, I somehow find the way to the door of their hell and escape. After so many years, I feel pity when they say, why have you forgiven me..?? It killed me…!!..What……, did I..!! OH BRUTUS….I converse here in silence and for your surprise they smile when I calmly say that I am sorry for that, because …till date I never thought that I had to say sorry for my forgiveness…..sorry for my forgiveness….!!!!!

YAVISHTHA KAUSHIK

“I WAS BORN NUDE”……BUT WERE YOU*****???

“I AM WRITING THIS TO GIVE ANSWER TO MY FEW SO CALLED FACEBOOK FRIENDS WHO WROTE VERY DEROGATORY AND DEPRAVED COMMENTS AND WORDS ABOUT ME AND MY FEW NUDE PAINTINGS IN RESPONSE TO MY REQUEST TO WRITE A TESTIMONY IN MY PROFILE ON A POPULAR ONLINE ART WEBSITE……LOOK”…I AM NOT GOOD IN WRITING, SO TO EXPRESS MYSELF, I JUST PAINT,….BUT WHATEVER I AM GOING TO WRITE, READ CAREFULLY AND TRY TO UNDERSTAND, IF YOU COULD…………………

“SURREALISM” means…Pure psychic automatism, by which one proposes to, express, either verbally, in writing, or by any other manner, the real functioning of thought. Dictation of thought in the absence of all control exercised by reason, outside of all aesthetic and moral preoccupation. Surrealism is based on the belief in the superior reality of certain forms of previously neglected associations, in the omnipotence of dream, in the disinterested play of thought. It tends to ruin once and for all other psychic mechanisms and to substitute itself for them in solving all the principal problems of life.

Surrealism is a style using subconscious mental activity as its subject matter, characterized by dream like hallucinatory imagery to produce fantastic incongruous imagery through unnatural juxtaposition. it is free from conscious rational control and it is free of convention, it represent unconscious thought and dream which I can sustain in my subconscious till I complete the painting and needless to say my paintings are very different from other surrealistic painters….i never claimed that i am a surrealistic painter but masters of art and critic of art and painting do…..And here is a testimony for my paintings by Dr.ANUPAM BHATNAGER (ASSOCIATE PROFFESER AND HEAD OF DEPARTMENT, P.G DEPT.OF DRAWING AND PAINTING, DAYANAND COLLEGE AJMER)……….”DR YAVISHTHA KAUSHIK’S CREATIONS INVOLVE THE TRADITION OF ART OF THE 20^TH CENTURY-FROM SURREALISM AND METAPHYSICS PAINTING TO THE STREAM OF SYMBOLISM AND METAPHOR. SYMBOLISM FOR HIM IS LIKE A WINDOW TO THE WORLD.SURREALISM HELPS THE ARTIST TO PRESENT FANTASTIC LANDSCAPES WITH DIFFERENT MOTIVES. COMPOSITION OF HIS WORK STAY ON EACH OTHER: REALISM AND FANTASY: THE WORK OF DR.KAUSHIK REMINDS THE PHOTOS OF A SLEEPY DREAM. NATURE-FASCINATION REMAINS UNCHANGABLE IN THE ENTIRE WORK AND ALSO WOMEN WHO FASCINATE THE ARTIST FOR HER IMPOSSIBLE INNER PERSONALITY AND SPIRITUALITY TO GUESS.YAVISHTHA’S PAINTINGS INVOLVE A FREE LIGHT OF NATURAL FORCES AND HUMAN PASSIONS WITH THE EXTRAORDINARY POWER IN SPITE OF SCENE AND TIME OF ACTION.HIS CANVASSES ARE “READ LIKE A BOOK AND HEARD LIKE AN EPIC”…………..

Now compare yourself with this testimony by Proff.Dr Bhatnager, what you wrote AS A TESTIMONY “and what WORDS” you used……..(VULGAR,INDECENT,PORNOGRAPHIC,YOUR WIFE,PAINT HER NUDE,STRONGLY CONDEMN YOUR ART,APRAISE FOR OSTENTATIOUS NUDITY,INSANE,PROMISCUOUS,ETC,ETC…)

“I PAINT TRUTH” — truth is bound to be nude and there is meaningful difference between nude and naked. Truth cannot hide itself. I don’t paint nudity, I don’t paint vulgarity. I paint objects as I think them, imagine them in my pure and rich mind, not as I see them or as you see them. I certainly paint nude souls. What can be more aesthetically attractive and mentally challenging surface than the skin around a soul on the canvas? The body painted nude in my painting always expresses the spirit whose envelope it is. Art is about showing and seeing: to showthat which is truly or apparently concealed. What is the apparent body? It is just the shadow of a shadow of your own love that contains the entire universe. The undressed is vulgar – the nude is pure. And your clothes sometimes become a hindrance, they hide the nude truth, they become false and fake moral and fake social defences. The whole of nature is nude except man. Naked is a human artifact. Nude and Nudity is God’s art. You are against the nude human form in my paintings, not because nude human form in my painting but because it makes you aware of your nudity. Are Artists who create nude human forms getting ‘turned on’ while they create a nude figure in the painting? Our brains are in spatial thinking and imaginational creative mode and there conscious perverted sexual thoughts would get in the way and defeat the intention of entire composition of painting. Iam a human with awareness on Naturism and Nudity, Aesthetics andVulgarity, religion and spirituality, social and moral compulsions… I am aware of difference between nude and naked, Aesthetics and Vulgarity. Awareness cannot do anything that is immoral, bad, amateurish and vulgar. That is the ultimate beauty of awareness, that anything that comes out of it is simply beautiful, is simply right…Awareness is in my painting. Awareness is the state or ability to perceive, to feel, or to be conscious of events, objects, or sensory patterns according to your intelligence, the level of your mental acuity. In this level of consciousness, sense data can be confirmed by an observer without necessarily implying understanding, Whatsoever you want to understand in my painting….

More broadly, it is the state or quality of being aware of something if you want to shed your prejudices against my paintings. In psychology, awareness is defined as a human’s or an animal’s perception and cognitive reaction (of or pertaining to the mental processes of perception, memory, judgment, and reasoning, as contrasted with emotional and volitional processes.)according to the level of your intelligence,To a condition or event and here in this particular case my nude paintings. I have a deep, unconventional and unparalleled sensibility with very clear and pure mind with very vast knowledge, even of occult. According to my psychiatrist, my psyche is brimming with very exceptionally high intelligentsia, with extra ordinary original and unconventional characteristics but not channeled properly because of physical and psychological unfavorable circumstances coupled with traumatic past experiences…which comes out in my paintings…it may be difficult for some of you to understand… And in my mind and heart I Never fight with your kind of lie, greed, ego, anger, jealousy, attitude, love, hatred, nudity, vulgarity, obscenity, immorality, all form of covered and uncovered human body and soul — all these fake enemies that the religions and fake spiritual persons you are following because you have nothing of your own, have been telling you, “Fight with them, don’t look at them, that is beauty, that is vulgar, that is immoral, that is unsocial… crush them, kill them, follow me I will tell you the right path. But in reality even in your imagination You cannot kill them, you cannot crush them, you cannot fight with them, you cannot ignore them, and I tell you…all that you can do is just be aware of them. And the moment you are aware, they are gone, in the own light in your mind, the darkness of your fake morality and false promiscuous beliefs simply disappears.

A painting takes root in the dark depths of pure imagination of the painter’s subconscious mind. Similarly, meditation and ecstasy are born in the same dark depth where the light of your intellect cannot reach, where every process of unconscious mentation comes to a stop, where even knowledge ceases to be in your Mind which is just the situation of your head: A fool is one who goes on trusting…and for me trust is just that you don’t want to know or accept the nude truth repeatedly and it is my faith that Innocence is the base of all spirituality.

LET ME EXPLAIN….IN SIMPLE WORDS SO THAT YOU CAN UNDERSTAND…..

If you eat human shit thinking it is jaggery naturally you will feel nauseating and will vomit, it is not my fault if someone has no capacity to distinguish between human shit and jaggery. …categorization is for those who have no knowledge of concern subject and who want to be the verbal and moral master of that subject and critics like you are those who failed to do anything in the concern subject subjectively or objectively…..and they morally categorize the subject at the level of their mental acuity to criticize only without evaluating my very high intelligentsia and mental level. I have found that the persons who had studied painting least and have least knowledge of subject matter are the best judges of my so called nude paintings… “GOD has not categorized anything and he made the cosmos nude”… He even put our anus at longest possible distance at cancelled place from our mouth and it is a pure nude truth particularly in your apparent world. People eat honey because they don’t know how it is made by honeybees; I know how it is made so I don’t eat it. Do you know how honeybees make the sweet honey? Whenever we shut our brain and mental faculty in the name of fake morality and pseudo-spiritualism, pseudo-psycho-social superiority your mouth opens and you eat honey in the name of sweetness, I mean any kind of sweetness according to your own selfish likeness. If someone has nothing to throw out, he is utterly empty, absolutely clean and silent then where is the need for love, morality, nudity, vulgarity, obsessive compulsion and compassion ,faith, trust, spirituality and creativity for him and for whom …”subjectively or objectively”……I think with these kind of thoughts, moral,faith,spirituality,meditation,,,all are  merely a wastage of time. Nude is divinity and through nudes we see divine forms. That is why in India many temples have nude idols of gods entangled in raptures. It is not eroticism; it is humanism in their great manifestations… Whether we want or not paintings and images evoke feelings. If women are depicted with the emphasis on their sexuality, those paintings evoke feelings, WHICH DEPENDS ON THE LEVEL AND STANDARD OF YOUR MIND AND YOUR AWARENESS WHICH I HAVE ALREADY EXPLAINED…NOT WITH THE ARTIST’S AWARENESS, it is your level of awareness…not mine…you just see what you are aware of………what your trained mind and eyes want to see…….who see with loving eyes, life is beautiful.And it is because of these minds that you cannot understand me, what I am painting. What I am painting is very simple…!…simply a nude , in a complicated composition surreal beautiful nudes, an aesthetic nude, a non vulgar nude painting, non obscene, non-pornographic nude painting, non-erotic nude painting…for which eminent artists say that these paintings are in surrealistic style..,and why no one felt offended in my various painting exhibitions? To be offended by the visual appearance of another imaginary person’s image in my painting is prejudice, If you drop your prejudices, your preconceived opinion that is not based on reason or actual experience. If you drop your fake morality, fake spiritualism, pseudo-spiritualism, pseudo-psycho-social superiority,pseudo-mastery, If you put your cheap ideas a little bit aside and you look silently at my nude painting after reading this article or answer to your derogatory comment, the truth of what I am painting will be self-evident. If nudity offends you, you are disrespecting God’s greatest creation.

Body shame, like prejudice, is not natural. It is learned from others and does not benefits any . How is it possible for the human body, which was created in the image of god, to be offensive to anybody? I imagine my painting and I paint my imagination. I paint my own reality of my imagination. The meaning  of what i wrote here will be  only clear to you by  thorough search and your through” search in my painting with awakening of your awareness to the subject matter. If I could say it in words, there would be no reason for me to paint. Such is my relationship with God. IF I DESCRIBE “GOD” IN WORDS AS YOU ALL DO, THERE WOULD BE NO REASON FOR ME TO HAVE FAITH IN “GOD” BECAUSE HE IS JUST SOMETHING WHICH I CREATED WITH WORDS,,,,!!!!….

,,,,!!!!…. I have awareness to my vision of life, and now I am in conflict with those who wanted me to paint not what I saw and imagine but what they wanted me to see and imagine. You just stop looking at the iron walls created in your mind by yourself and try to look out for the window.Through which I just want to touch your soul. I only wish I could be sure it was the right thing to do. The expression in my painting is important to me…it was just supposed to make you feel something.

 

OH! ONE MORE THING, IF I JUST OFFENDED YOU, PLEASE  NOTE, I DONT DO VULGARITY”, NUDITY”, PROFANITY” ,OBSCENE MORALITY”,PSEUDO-SPIRITUALITY”,  NOT SUFFERING FROM GYMNOPHOBIA” AND  STUPIDITY”.AND EVEN AFTER READING THIS SIMPLIFIED VERSION OF MY THOUGHTS AND ABOUT MY PAINTINGS, IF THESE ARE YOUR CORE VALUES,

THAN BYE!

DR.YAVISHTHA KAUSHIK

www.yavishthaart.com

“DREAM”..My Painting and Poem by EVGENIA ROUBESI from Greece…”can you hear”

“Can You Hear?

Time filled with slippery trails.
No light, no sound.
A grayish chain of events is confusing me
and puts me to walk wrongly.
I forgot why I came here.
So?
What if I forgot?
I will pick some dirt, and leave, just like everyone else does.
Will you miss me?

Could you tame a feather that falls from the nest with the chicks?
Could you?
No, you cannot.
That’s why you will not miss me.

Cherry trees come to my mind, occasionally
Trey are not real
I have never been in a field with cherry trees in my life.
But occasionally I remember them.
They are full of flowers.
And then they are full o fruits
it is so relieving.
That red is so relieving.
And as I try to cut a branch, they disappear.
They disappear because they are not real

What about you?
Are you real?

You talk to me.
“It hurts,” you say to me
“I surrender”, you say to me
“I laugh,” you say to me
“I’m thirsty,” you say to me
“I fight,” you say to me

“I know you” …
You never told me “I know you”
That’s how I realized you ‘re not real

I will pick some dirt and I will leave.
Just like everybody else does.
Yes, that’s what I’ll do.”

By….EVGENIA ROUBESI

“DREAM” (OIL ON CANVAS) 48 X 36 INCHES

“BETRAYAL”….NOT EASY TO HANDLE”

                                     “POISON” (OIL ON CANVAS) 72 X 48 INCHES

Betrayal can only happen if you love. 
I trusted you. I know, my mistake
I know that 
Behind every smile lies a dark story.
I am betrayed
And I want to kill someone
But which one first
The person who betrayed me
Or 
The person for whom.
I am betrayed…
“Have I hurt you too much?”

Yavishtha Kaushik

http://www.yavishthaart.com